Poop!

Poop seems to be a popular conversation topic so I thought I would have that as my one word title for this post. Odd? Yes. But I can be odd as well so I think it fits.

I posted about Garrison telling me he had to poop mid sentence the other day on FB and since all of you who read this are on FB I won't go into that story again. But I think it's interesting just how obsessed he is with poop. I thought it was just a stage he might be going through. Why would I think this? Becuase he uses the word a lot. Garrison to our dog Sox: "You're a poo poo butt Sox! hahahahahahaha!" He cracks himself up all the time. He likes to just say it for no reason at all. I thought it was a 4 year old thing until I started getting tons of comments on FB about my poop post. Apparently everyone enjoys the topic of poop. So here are a few more:

Last night Garrison was sitting on the potty and after about 10 minutes I walked by and said, "Are you done yet?" His response: "No, mommy, I'm still squirting!" WHAT?!?! Where does he hear this stuff? His father I'm SURE!

We were at his daycare one morning this week. When you walk in you have to electronically clock your child in. (Great method by the way to ensure a random psycho doesn't come to pick your child up from school one day.) I was clocking him in and he stood there and announced in front of the entire room, "I'm gonna' FART mommy!" And of course he can't put the same emphasis on the word fart as he does the others. No, no - this word is of the utmost importance. So I tried as best I could to ignore his comment and we went into the hallway where all the classrooms were. I said, "Garrison, let's not say that." He said, "Why not mommy? Fart isn't a bad word!" How to explain to a 4 year old that we can laugh at home all day about farts but not talk about them at school is challenging, especially when the crowd who just heard his comment was filtering out into the hallway. So I did what any mature, responsible parent would do. I said, "Do you think you can beat me to your classroom?" When all else fails, change the subject!

Garrett worked until 1:30 AM last night and was exhausted when he got home. I was in a dead sleep when the dogs jumped off the bed and started barking like they were ready for a full on attack of the "night intruder". My heart was pounding until I realized where I was and that it was just Garrett. Those are some good watch dogs. Did I ever tell y'all about the time we lived in Connecticut and Sox almost ripped Garrett to shreds? I was in bed and Sox was laying at the foot of the bed. Garrett came home late from work and opened the door. Sox was growling, teeth baring, drooling, barking like I had NEVER heard him do before. I swear I thought he was going to leap off the bed and attack. I hear Garrett banging his hand against the wall in desperate search of the light switch to prove it was really him. The whole time he's shouting, "Boogie (what we call Sox), it's me! Boogie! It's Daddy!!!" in this high pitched what-the-hell I'm about to die voice. It was priceless!!! As soon as he flicked the light on Sox laid back down as if nothing happened while Garrett stood there sweating and panting. Haha! Good guard dog indeed! Now I ax ya' (ever seen My Cousin Vinny? Great movie!) - do these look like mean dogs to you? By the way, click on the links at the end to see two classic My Cousin Vinny clips.

Well, I'm hoping Garrett can get my car fixed tonight so we can still make it to Coleman this weekend to see his Granny. I'm sure you saw on FB it will be over $1300 to fix at the shop. Hopefully my handy hubby can get it done for way cheaper but the question is does he have the time? My car is screeching so loud this woman walking her dog yesterday turned and looked at me as if she feared for her life when I was driving down the road. So if y'all see a silver Xterra that sounds like it's dying a slow and painful death, don't be skerd. It's just me and my metal grinding on metal brakes begging for a little TLC. Sounds sweet when you put it that way right? Not so much.

MY COUSIN VINNY CLIPS:
My favorite scene:
http://www.mefeedia.com/entry/opening-statement/11040467
Watch for language in this one:
http://www.mefeedia.com/entry/pants/11040494

Jewels*

You are my sunshine!

Monday morning I got Garrison out of bed and he was all groggy and I was fully prepared for a whiney Monday morning. While that did come later he said the sweetest words to me a few minutes after climbing out of bed. "Mommy, you are my sunshine!" Sometimes I think (scratch that, I know) I have the sweetest little boy ever! He totally made my Monday!

Isn't it funny how sometimes words (as opposed to materialistic objects) can totally make one's day/week/month? Last week my husband came home from work and walked over to me and out of the blue said, "I just want you to know how much I appreciate you. You do so much around the house, you help me with school, you work full time, and you take care of Garrison. I just wanted you to know how grateful I am." After I sat there with my jaw on the floor for a few seconds I laughed at him. You heard me. I know you're sitting there thinking, "What a B!" But this was SO out of the ordinary for him to say that I was thinking he was going to ask for a $2,000 part for his Jeep or something. Haha! After I realized he was serious and really was being sincere I told him that his comment made my week. What can I say? I don't require much! Just a little appreciation every now and then and I'm a happy girl!

My baby boy is growing up WAY too fast. I know I've said this before but it just hits me at certain times how big he's getting to be. Or we'll share a moment that I know I will never forget. Last night was one of these times. Garrett was at school and I was tucking Garrison into bed. Sometimes I sing to him at night before I leave his room. I haven't done this in a while but last night he asked me to stay and "sing something Mommy". So I sang Amazing Grace. He laid there rubbing his hands threw his hair (which INSTANTLY took me back to when he was about 9 months old as this was the move he would always do when falling asleep) and his eyes were getting droopy. My eyes immediately filled as I realized how quickly he was growing up. I won't always be able to have moments like that with him. I am learning to really, truly treasure every single moment with him because time really does go by way too fast. He asked me to sing Twinkle, Twinkle with him and the the "HalleLUjia song" as he calls it. This is the fast version of Amazing Grace with the hallelujia part in it if y'all know what I'm talking about. My big boy sat there and sang the whole thing with me. Precious I tell ya'!

Yesterday after work I took Garrison to our neighborhood swimming pool. I saw a mom there with her kids and she made a beeline to me. Ugh! I really am a very sociable person but for some reason I have no desire to socialize with people at my swimming pool. Maybe it's because I already feel like a bloated hippo wading in the kiddie pool and don't want to be talking to anyone while I'm leaning over and my boobs are hanging in their toddlers' faces. Or maybe I just don't want to talk to anyone. Whatever the reason - I was alreay annoyed that this woman was headed my way. So she sits down and starts asking 20 questions. Why??? Just LEAVE ME ALONE is what I wanted to say. That sounds so mean but it really does get old. Anyways, I've seen this woman at the pool before and let's just say I completely disagree with her parenting style. I know you may be thinking why is this any of my business and it's probably not. But it does get frustrating when Garrison watches kids behaving in a certain way and then thinks he wants to give it a try. So the mom tells all 3 of her kids it's time to go. I swear they did not leave until 45 minutes after that comment. The kids were jumping back in the pool every time she turned around. Instead of going in the pool after them and spanking their ass and telling them to get in the car (that's harsh and I'm only kidding, kind of) she would use her "sweet mommy" coaxing voice to get them to come out. "Okay kids (remember the mommy voice here) it's time to get out. I'm going to count to 5...1...2...3...4...5... really guys, come on... let's go.... oh girls you're being silly... and now you're just showing off...." I sat here watching the scene unfold with my mouth hanging open. Tell the kids to get out of the pool and make them listen! What is SO hard about this concept? It just frustrates me because I can totally see this woman having MAJOR problems on her hands in about 10 years when these girls are teenagers and she has no control at all over them. Okay, I'm done with that rant.

I was having a great morning today. On time, Garrison was in a great mood, ready for the day. So we decided to give the dogs a treat before we left. I keep their treats in canisters on the counter. I opened the canister and it was FILLED with ants. Nice! We had a sugar ant problem a few months back but got rid of them successfully. Now these are some kind of carpenter ants. So I spent about 10 minutes cleaning up what I could and spraying our ant spray around the baseboard and counter in that area. Ugh! Now I get to go home and fight the ants again. I WILL WIN! Dah dah dah DAH dah dah dah dah DAH DAH!!! That was my success music!

Have a great day everyone!

Jewels*